Well, hello there.

Oh, RIGHT. I have a BLOG.

Well, I’ve had a good excuse for my absence:

That’s right, chickens. Four years and much drama and aggro later, I am finally up the stick.

“What’s the secret?”, you ask. “What finally did the trick?”

Well, being paralyzed into inaction, then getting busy with work and life and not even keeping track of Cycles and Phases and Special Times, and go about your business for a few weeks, then feeling like, Hm, Something Is Up, then pee on three home tests that all come out negative, assume something horrible is going on, then go to the doctor and be like, SOMETHING IS UP, and then pee on their test there, and then while you are sitting in a paper gown awaiting stirrup time, have the nurse poke her head in to the exam room and say, “You’re gonna need to put your clothes back on…”, (then die inside because OH GOD WHAT NOW),”…because you’re pregnant.” And then you will ACTUALLY ALMOST DIE WHILE WEARING THE PAPER GOWN, and you will cry and start to hyperventilate, and the nurse will have to come over and hold you to keep from falling and hurting yourself, and you ask her over and over again, “ARE YOU SURE? ARE YOU SURE THAT WAS MY PEE? ARE YOU SURE?”, and then you almost die again when during the examination, the doc is all, “Yep, you feel about six weeks along!”, and you actually say “OH SHIT.” out loud in front of the nurse and your doctor. Then drive home in a happy, teary fog so you can tell your husband in the hour you have to see each other before he leaves for his night class to take a test which he now CANNOT FOCUS ON AT ALL.

See, it’s all so simple! And non-dramatic! Just like the journey to get here!

It has been a nauseous, exhausting, and exhilarating few weeks, and I am still having a hard time believing it, but the THUMPaTHUMPaTHUMPa heartbeat and seeing ACTUAL FINGERS, THE MOST GORGEOUS FINGERS I HAVE EVER SEEN on the ultrasound assure me that This Is Happening.

I am terrified, and thrilled, and like, STUPID happy.